[If it were anyone else who'd been affected like this by the demon's actions - anyone other than Near, L, and Sharon - Mello wouldn't have as many damns to give about this as he does. Other people have always been collateral damage in his schemes, other people have often suffered as a result of the mistakes he's made over the years; he thinks, briefly, about Rod and the rest of the Mafia, falling down screaming and then dead in that warehouse last November, and he thinks about Matt, who will be killed in helping him enact his final stratagem against Kira, unless Mello is able to alter that path for him. With the exception of Matt, Mello hasn't regretted their fates, because those other lives were an entirely acceptable cost to be paid toward reaching his goals.
But Near and L and Sharon are different. Mello does care if they're caught in the crossfire of his missteps. And he isn't willing to sacrifice any of them.]
We can sit here and debate ethics and responsibility all day, Near - it won't accomplish anything. That demon may be gone, but there's no guarantee it won't come back, and I think we've both been here long enough to know that we can expect something just as bad or worse to strike before too long. I'm not willing to create a situation where I'll end up endangering you again. You -
[Mello tips up his head again, brushes his hair out of his face, allows his gaze to fall on Near again. This brand of honesty is a bad idea and he knows it, but he's already come this far, hasn't he. This bell cannot be unrung, so he may as well ring it louder. His mouth presses into a thin line for a moment as he inhales a deep, fortifying breath in preparation for the truthbomb that falls out of his mouth in the next instant:]
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Date: 2017-01-06 05:32 am (UTC)But Near and L and Sharon are different. Mello does care if they're caught in the crossfire of his missteps. And he isn't willing to sacrifice any of them.]
We can sit here and debate ethics and responsibility all day, Near - it won't accomplish anything. That demon may be gone, but there's no guarantee it won't come back, and I think we've both been here long enough to know that we can expect something just as bad or worse to strike before too long. I'm not willing to create a situation where I'll end up endangering you again. You -
[Mello tips up his head again, brushes his hair out of his face, allows his gaze to fall on Near again. This brand of honesty is a bad idea and he knows it, but he's already come this far, hasn't he. This bell cannot be unrung, so he may as well ring it louder. His mouth presses into a thin line for a moment as he inhales a deep, fortifying breath in preparation for the truthbomb that falls out of his mouth in the next instant:]
You're too important.