Perhaps you can ask Mello if I was ever taken away for maintenance and had my memory wiped of those occasions. In which case, things could be very bad for me with my programmer absent. [Also being a shit.]
It would ironically make all of his frustrations with me his own fault.
[Honestly, he does think Mello projects too much, sees criticism even when it isn't there. So he's responsible for his own feelings. But the fact that he's always performed better than Mello at the House is his own. And he's not sorry about it.]
[And he's entertained enough himself to humour it. He actually hasn't had "vampire" suggested to him before. Then again, he might have had he been on that particular Jaunt. In any event, the second suggestion is more fun to play with.]
And whose friend would I be? [He has no friends. He knows this and is fine with it. Even if he and Mello are making efforts to get along better now, it's certainly not a friendship by any stretch.]
Mello's. You were developed in childhood as a coping mechanism, and though he's tried, he's really never been able to shake you. [ It's more than a little ridiculous, but she's all right with that. ]
[He doesn't care whether she apologizes or not. It doesn't matter.]
No, I did not. [His contempt had been reserved for those unable to keep up, and those that would fawn over him in attempts to be in the good graces of the top student in an institution where intelligence had been everything. Mello had been able to keep up, and challenged him instead of praising him.]
Why? [ It could just have been another one of those feelings things he doesn't seem to have, or maybe it was because he never had to be the one fighting to come out on top. ]
[It's true that he never had to fight very hard to stay on top; he is naturally gifted and makes no apologies for that. That perhaps is part of it.]
Why should I? That someone could compete was refreshing. [Nobody else could measure up. Could Matt have, if he'd bothered? It doesn't matter. And Near had never held any contempt for him either as he hadn't been a member of the fawning crowds. Indifference, but not contempt.]
Ah. I'm guessing you never told him that back then? [ Things have changed between Near and Mello now, she knows that. It kind of seems like their whole relationship could have been different if things were just done... right, whatever right really means. Maybe as children they were just too different. Even now, they may as well be as different as night and day. ]
I should not need to spell everything out for him.
[There is more to it than that. It would have been showing a weakness, a crack in the armor. Not something he had been about to do back when they'd still been competing, and something he'd been loathe to do even here.]
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Date: 2016-10-30 02:02 am (UTC)[Honestly, he does think Mello projects too much, sees criticism even when it isn't there. So he's responsible for his own feelings. But the fact that he's always performed better than Mello at the House is his own. And he's not sorry about it.]
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Date: 2016-10-31 01:32 am (UTC)[But here's something else . . .] You've also failed to be the first to ask me if I am a ghost.
[Surprise? Probably not.]
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Date: 2016-10-31 08:06 pm (UTC)[ She knows he's human, but this is one good way to entertain herself and waste time. ] Oh, no, better yet: imaginary friend.
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Date: 2016-10-31 08:23 pm (UTC)And whose friend would I be? [He has no friends. He knows this and is fine with it. Even if he and Mello are making efforts to get along better now, it's certainly not a friendship by any stretch.]
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Date: 2016-11-09 04:37 am (UTC)Less so now. But he hated me quite a bit when we were children.
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Date: 2016-11-09 04:26 pm (UTC)[But the contempt had never gone both ways.]
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Date: 2016-11-11 08:51 pm (UTC)[ Even as disconnected as he seems, surely that kind of pressure bred some form of dislike for his fellow. ]
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Date: 2016-11-11 10:47 pm (UTC)No, I did not. [His contempt had been reserved for those unable to keep up, and those that would fawn over him in attempts to be in the good graces of the top student in an institution where intelligence had been everything. Mello had been able to keep up, and challenged him instead of praising him.]
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Date: 2016-11-19 07:13 pm (UTC)Why should I? That someone could compete was refreshing. [Nobody else could measure up. Could Matt have, if he'd bothered? It doesn't matter. And Near had never held any contempt for him either as he hadn't been a member of the fawning crowds. Indifference, but not contempt.]
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Date: 2016-11-21 10:57 pm (UTC)text
Date: 2016-11-22 02:54 am (UTC)[There is more to it than that. It would have been showing a weakness, a crack in the armor. Not something he had been about to do back when they'd still been competing, and something he'd been loathe to do even here.]
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